OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
Randomize