ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize