I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
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