this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Can I crash on your couch? I just came home to find my wife giving two guys blowjobs.
Two?
Two.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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