They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
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