do herpes really smell.
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
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