my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Randomize
