You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
it was like his penis was on wheels.
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
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