Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
