I heard we made out
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
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