oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize