Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
