it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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