Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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