Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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