We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
