fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
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