Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
