He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
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