how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize
