My hair reeks of homosexuality.
I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
She announced her abortion via fbk
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
I sent the random girl I had sex with last night a 'happy mothers day' text as a reminder to get the morning after pill.
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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