we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Randomize
