one two three fourrrrnication!
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
Randomize
