I want to stick my p in your. b.
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.