Texts From Last Night

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  (561): View more from Florida

  Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.

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  (561): Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like. http://tfl.nu/svkw
  Replies (42) Good night (2855) Bad night (975)
• Favorite

  (313): View more from Michigan

  ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?

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  (313): ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too? http://tfl.nu/07vv
  Replies (67) Good night (711) Bad night (2685)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?

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  (310): what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'? http://tfl.nu/9kgd
  Replies (95) Good night (2241) Bad night (3402)
• Favorite

  (212): View more from New York

  I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.

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  (212): I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants. http://tfl.nu/n3gu
  Replies (50) Good night (5931) Bad night (1630)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  Did you just see the Batmobile???

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  (248): Did you just see the Batmobile??? http://tfl.nu/vqtz
  Replies (24) Good night (5799) Bad night (657)
• Favorite

  (423): View more from Tennessee

  I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!

  (615): View more from Tennessee

  I don't wanna die...

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  (423): I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!! (615): I don't wanna die... http://tfl.nu/h1ht
  Replies (10) Good night (6902) Bad night (1352)
• Favorite

  (313): View more from Michigan

  We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.

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  (313): We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn. http://tfl.nu/k4mq
  Replies (28) Good night (1604) Bad night (3527)
• Favorite

  (775): View more from Nevada

  Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls

  (702): View more from Nevada

  Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter

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  (775): Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls (702): Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter http://tfl.nu/jyvi
  Replies (9) Good night (4861) Bad night (1069)
• Favorite

  (360): View more from Washington

  i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge

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  (360): i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge http://tfl.nu/hurt
  Replies (6) Good night (1708) Bad night (633)
• Favorite

  (720): View more from Colorado

  You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.

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  (720): You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck. http://tfl.nu/hy5d
  Replies (3) Good night (1829) Bad night (676)
• Favorite

  (214): View more from Texas

  I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.

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  (214): I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002. http://tfl.nu/v8jb
  Replies (12) Good night (1210) Bad night (564)
• Favorite

  (864): View more from South Carolina

  I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago

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  (864): I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago http://tfl.nu/uywq
  Replies (13) Good night (392) Bad night (1263)
• Favorite

  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.

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  (608): Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants. http://tfl.nu/jnxo
  Replies (4) Good night (871) Bad night (441)
• Favorite

  (334): View more from Alabama

  Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?

  (334): View more from Alabama

  Oh we're gynecologists

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  (334): Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween? (334): Oh we're gynecologists http://tfl.nu/xv3o
  Replies (2) Good night (746) Bad night (371)
• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there

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  (540): I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there http://tfl.nu/auk6
  Replies (0) Good night (239) Bad night (94)

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