You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
Randomize
