Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
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