So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
