there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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