wat bout pragnant strippers??
I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
Randomize