I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
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