she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
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