my sisters under your porch take her home
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
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