Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
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