no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
wtf are you talking about? You vomit-splattered the cop from the balcony. The cop YOU called because you drunk-dialed 911 because a 5 year old ate the last donut.
it was a krispy kreme
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Randomize
