Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls