if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
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Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
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We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.