Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Randomize
