i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
Randomize
