Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
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