No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
First drunken handjob: not successful. Second handjob, mostly sober: much better. Nightly news brought to you by me.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
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