Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Randomize
