You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
Randomize
