do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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