that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize
