I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
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