I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
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