i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
