And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
MIDGETS
????
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
