I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
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