What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
Randomize
