i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize